I was intrigued by the title of this book, which my friend the publicist sent me. I think Kelly likes to send things to me that I wouldn't choose myself to read. Since I was reading some heavier science/theology books, I decided to check this one out as a lighter counterbalance to my other readings. It is lighter fare, but over time I became annoyed by the book (but more about that later).
The core plot line of this "spiritual memoir" is a series of therapy sessions - sort of marriage counseling with God. The author -- a screenwriter/comedian/actor - grew up a bible believing Christian, but found that life didn't go the way she'd hoped, and she kind of blamed God. The therapy sessions with God bring out her vision of God - who is a distant, capricious sort of guy - a mirror image of her father. She doesn't like God, and God, at least at first, is a bit sarcastic and demeaning. Jesus, on the other hand, she loves. But ultimately she discovers that the Jesus she loves is a bit wimpy.
The central plot twists are two-fold. One has to do with men and sex, which seem to cause her great difficulty. She believes in waiting for marriage, but time after time she gives in, and of course she feels guilty. This is compounded by the lack of "good" men in her life. The guys who she is most attracted to, the guys who seem to have the most to offer, aren't Christians. The Christian guys, the guys she meets at church, they're just too wimpy. Losers in fact. One of her closest friends is gay - but both he and she wonder why he can't be "healed." Ah, finding a good mate is difficult.
The other plot twist is her career. She's a gifted actor and writer. She appears in movies and commercials and TV shows. She goes to film school at UCLA and then gets a master's degree in screen writing at USC, but largely due to her own choices, she seems to continually burn bridges, lose agents, and lose opportunities. She blames God - well. She blames the church and its teachings. She wonders why her secular friends seem to have all the jobs (and all the sex).
Now for the annoyance. This is laid out as a spiritual memoir that explores the relationship of faith with humor. While the book is well written - she's a screenwriter after all - and has its moments - she's a good comic when she wants to be - I found myself having less and less sympathy for her. Yes, she had problems growing up. She had issues to deal with. But don't we all?
About half way through the book, I wanted to yell - grow up. Get a life. I mean, you seem to have a lot of success. You're smart, witty, well educated. You have lots of opportunities - more than most - so what's your problem?
My biggest problem is with the theology. This is the kind of sappy evangelicalism that promises roses without thorns, but at the same time offers a narrow vision as to life and the way it's lived. She turns down, for instance, a part in the Addams Family movie because - well its about witches and such. That leads to burning a bridge with an agent that got her good roles. I'm wondering - what was the big deal.
But maybe the problem lies with the churches she attends, most of which seem rather odd ball. One church is praying for healing and gets excited by people whose silver fillings turn gold. She thinks that's silly - wondering why if God is healing they don't new teeth rather than gold ones. Even when she goes to "mainline" churches they're pretty conservative - even fundamentalist. None of these churches help her develop a suitable view of God or of Jesus. I keep wanting to say - check out a more progressive congregation, one that will help you make better sense of your life.
So, what can I say about this book. I guess, I have to say, it's just not written to me. The cover is full of recommendations about how real and authentic the book is. I don't know. She seems annoying, even spoiled. She's angry with God, but she sure seemed to have lots of opportunities - most of which she ignored or turned down. What I'm saying is that this appears to be the spiritual memoir of a spiritually self-centered person. There is little evidence here that she cared much about anyone besides herself or a small circle of friends. Maybe if she'd joined up with Habitat for Humanity and built house for someone in greater need, she'd have a different view of life.
In the end, kind of like in Job, everything works out okay. She gets a good job, finds a man, gets married, gets to write a book, and reconciles with God. But it takes a long time to wander through the whining to get to that point.
Alas, perhaps the reason I have the most trouble with this book is that it reminds me of theologies and practices I've long ago left behind. I took a different path, a path I believe was healthier than the one she has taken. But then that's me. I realize that this review is a bit snarky, but what can I say?
